Snowy's N7 Application

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Snowy's N7 Application

Post by Snowy on Mon May 02, 2016 7:08 am

(( The app doesn't need to be looked at until they are open anyway, I don't mind. )))

Steam Name: Snowy
Steam ID:
Profile Link: steamcommunity.com/id/Snowable
Age: 23
How long have you been rping: 4 or so years
How did you find us: Friends
Have you been banned from Singularity Gaming: No I have not
_
Name: Aoife McCarthy
Age: 28
Species: Human
Why do you want to roleplay a character of said species?: I surprisingly know quite a bit about humans

How familiar are you with it? For the past 23 years I've stated at my face in the mirror, I know!
MOS (Military Occupational Specialty): N7 Combat/Tech Specialist.

Why do you want to roleplay within said MOS?
I feel like it wouldn't be a bad idea having a few specialists in the field that know what they are doing IC'ly. A lot of the IC cre[size=67]w are mix and matches from every walks of life, so I feel like having a human specialist in this certain field would be a interesting concept so to say.  [/size]

How OOCly familiar are you with the topic? I'm familiar with it. I know quite a deal about computers/technology, but admittadly I am not the greatest at combat, but I know the grasp of it to keep it steadily going.

You do understand as this is a private server and you have filled out a Application you can be removed from the Server or have your Character taken away within reason at any moment: Yes, I do.

Do you understand that any medical disabilities your character has would be present on a work form - And thus may make your character ineligible for a job in the Military? Yes, I am aware that this would make stuff complicated. My character is bi-polar, however she has a waiver stating that she has passed exams and such, as she hasn't experienced a 'episode' since the highlight of the Reaper War, when it was stressful on everyone. Medication, however can counteract such a episode *if* it so happens during the course of RP. ((Forgot to remove this, it's void now XP))

Are you also aware that this is a Joint-Task-Force Military, and that your character will be held to the standards of a soldier? Yes, I fully understand.

Two Paragraph Backstory:


Aoife was born in the south of Kerry, Ireland. She was a only daughter, however had many.. many childhood friends. She grew up with a average lifestyle. Her father, a military man and her mother running a self-employeed bio-engineering farm for crops at their home in Kerry. However, at young enough age she started causing trouble in her school, often starting small fights with classmates if they were to offend her, stupid silly stuff really. Herself, and her mother had travelled to child-pyschologist in the heart of Dublin. Fair enough, she had been given her treatment, sessions with the doctor once a week and such. However, she still caused small issues at her school yet still went through primary and secondary school with decent enough grades. She even finished her third-level education in advanced computing and networking. Looking for places to use these skills, she followed in her fathers footsteps, she wanted to be just like him - which lead her in pursuit of a career in the military. Being good with technology naturally, she felt like she'd be a fitting asset, if anything.

After finding her ways into the Alliance military by means of working up-through a cyber security sub-division of the Alliance, She had successful been accepted, and gone through basic military camp with minor faults on her part. Surviving it, with light setbacks like anyone would - she had passed as a technological specialist with combat training under her belt. Aoife had been sent off to work onboard an Alliance research vessel out in the vasts of space.

(Changes up from here since my last application :p)

Spending the better part of seven months on this vessel, Aoife had returned back to Earth, a interest sparking inside her to try out the Interplanetary Combatives Training school after hearing the past stories and adventures those who passed through it before. With herself, and her small-bunch of marine friends from the vessel, they all attempted to apply for this school. With their luck, they got accepted bar one - who was devastated, obviously. However, three weeks later - they upped and went to this Academy to begin their N-1 Training program in the hopes of passing the first series of tests. Aoife, naturally had flawlessly passed technological-centred training programs and did her best with the combat side - which went pretty well considering.

In the end, she had passed her N-1 program, and with a firm handshake of their supervisor she was offered to return for the subsequent courses. With a few weeks break, she returned to begin her N-2 program. Straight into the training, as it happened - The class was sent on a mission to a actual off-planet training facility for a more hostile approach. Months at this, she had successfully risen the ranks from N-2 through N-5, with her greatest skills focused on technology of course, and human/alien biology and linguistics. Majoring these, she had passed this essentially 'basic' training. Considered for the next grade of training, N-6 she was told this would provide a actual combat experience to test the skills they have learned over the course of their ICT program.

However, as luck would have it - The Reaper War had been glimpsed at this point. A heavy deal of marines being recalled back to help the War effort back home, Aoife was on the list. With the opportunity as it was, to both help her home and run her training at the same time - she opted to return home to help. Being lead by a designated N-7 officer, the rest in their training as N-6's, arrived in London for the start of it. Helping clearing streets, and buildings - Aoife finally had the proper chance to use her skills, and for once was a live subject. The Husks. Shooting them one by one as they surrounded them, they held their ground in the collapsed apartment block while a diversion group did their best to rescue civilian-survivors.

Having lost some good friends, it had taken a toll on her. Gaining a semi-depressive state every now and then due to the heavy stress caused. Upon the fall of the Reapers, it wasn't until then did she feel like herself, somewhat. Seeking advice from a psychologist however, she was deemed fit still to continue with the N-6 training, and hopefully the N-7 following this.

Following the War, she was given the grade of N-6, having survived both the War and the tied-in training, she was considered for the N-7 title. Taking a well-deserved break in the mean time, she awaits confirmation if she had been accepted, or not.


(I'm piss at making stories as anyone can confirmed... xD sorry if thats cringy to read somewhat, I repeat myself a lotttttt of the time Razz This doesn't need to be looked at until apps for N7 are open, I don't mind really I'll be stuck on layna anyway in the mean time xD thanks)


Last edited by Snowy on Thu May 05, 2016 4:46 pm; edited 15 times in total
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Re: Snowy's N7 Application

Post by Toki on Mon May 02, 2016 9:28 am

I mean, the app is pretty good. My problem is the fact that your character is bipolar.

Bipolarism is never mild enough to where it would be inactive to the point of you being capable of joining the military. In fact, bipolarism is typically associated with depression, mania, schizophrenia, and even psychosis.

Bipolarism can't just drop off either. It makes no sense for you to say that it just quit bothering her at a random point in her life. Manic episodes are also, incredibly terrible things. A person experiencing a manic episode often has feelings of self-importance, elation, talkativeness, increased sociability, and a desire to embark on goal-oriented activities, coupled with the characteristics of irritability, impatience, impulsiveness, hyperactivity, and a decreased need for sleep. Usually this manic period is followed by a period of severe depression

So that means that if your character began to act up in important situations, they would become incredibly impatient with everything, and would be completely unable to control how irritated they become with the simplest inconvenience. Therefore, your character would be seen as a sort of uncontrollable soldier, and would most definitely be seen as unfit for service, mentally.
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Re: Snowy's N7 Application

Post by Snowy on Mon May 02, 2016 9:58 am

Mhm, no I completely get where you are coming at. I understand that it is a sketchy disorder to have especially when it comes along with something in the military, unpredictable stuff tend to happen - an MOST-DEFO when it comes to this N7 thing, that's why I threw in the wavier thingie, to state the character's for the better part, alright to serve - but obviously that may not be the entire case, specially if something drastic happens with the crew/on an event and such. Another factor I threw bipolarism in there is because I don't want to be this pitch-perfect character, I wanted some sort of flaw. But, ultimately in saying that, the disorder isn't a major part of this character anyway - If I needed to, I can remove it and say it was more of a depressing episode rather than it being affiliated with being bi-polar. I absolutely hate having the *perfect* character/person RPing, and like having flaws because it gives you something interesting to work of off.

Saying that, if it's entirely possible, with this wavier issued to the character - allowing her to stay in duty despite this, I'd love to keep it in as a factor of her mental health. If not, I haven't a issue in removing it, and just fly it off as being depressed considering the toll the Reaper's caused on everyone non-super human/alien during the War xD or have it so that it's just not known really, that the crew don't know she has it and that she keeps it to herself. But then face the music if she starts acting up... might get the character shot and flung into the vacuum of space, but it'd make awesome RP all the same while it lasts haha x3

And thank's for saying it was a good app aswell, I practically just wrote than anything that popped into my head, even had to consult someone on pointers how to actually write a app properly *after* I done this, ugh. o.o
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Re: Snowy's N7 Application

Post by TheIrishGhost on Mon May 02, 2016 10:08 am

I like the app myself to be honest. But I don't know the stand the admins here have for character transfers. Back in another Gmod community, I was at one point in charge of the ODST faction, a special forces faction just like N7 here, so character transfers don't happen often unless very special occasions.

When you have a character on the server, people will see them and talk to them. So for that character to return the next day as an N-Seven Operative is going to puzzle so many people because that doesn't really happen in the real world for transfers or any real Sci-Fi universe.

But next is the timeframe, like ODST training, N-School also takes a long while, so that means you would technically have to wait numerous years to become a CO and go through N-School. Since we go day by day. It is technically impossible to have this character become N-Seven.

Honestly, I say use a brand new character. It is better than having to deal with time issues and complaints. Like I said, good app, just the character transfer isn't the best idea. Mainly because it is impossible.
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Re: Snowy's N7 Application

Post by Snowy on Mon May 02, 2016 10:12 am

Thanks for your input Smile You're right in saying that. I haven't used my human character much at all, but I have already interacted with a few people already. Might be wise to have a new character alright... I didn't even come to think of the timeframe and the interactions (makes me sound stupid I know, but I didn't. xD)
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Re: Snowy's N7 Application

Post by Snowy on Mon May 02, 2016 10:26 am

There, fixed. Overhaul in some parts Very Happy
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Re: Snowy's N7 Application

Post by Toki on Mon May 02, 2016 10:58 am

Like I said; Good app. But it's not like you're applying to be a typical marine, you're talking about the N7 program here. Not attempting to offend in *any* way, but it'd be 5 times as hard to get through the N7 program with a disorder such as Bipolarism
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Re: Snowy's N7 Application

Post by Snowy on Mon May 02, 2016 11:05 am

I am extremely sorry for you guys reading back over this... o.o

I fixed it again, I took your advice somewhat Toki and scrapped the idea of the bi-polarism as you do give decent points about it being a issue, especially seeing as its the N7 and all. I like the feedback all the same. I scrapped it, instead made her more of a trouble maker in school, and that when the war hit she just hit a depression-phase. Nothing *too* serve now :3

(Plus, I already have the other char accepted, so if I wanted to do this type RP I can just use my other human, so its all good)

So, UPDATED AGAIN. I am so sorry for the reviewers, I should have thought about this a looot more.
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Re: Snowy's N7 Application

Post by Snowy on Thu May 05, 2016 7:14 am

Fixed a error in my app, everything should be perfect naow finally!
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Re: Snowy's N7 Application

Post by icechuck11 on Thu May 05, 2016 4:19 pm

I'm gonna cut in here.

Issue one: Bipolar ism. Despite signing a waiver, you're joining the most difficult to join special operations unit in the Alliance. Having a medical disorder like your character does makes them a liability, waiver or otherwise.

Issue two: How you joined the N program. You need to be an officer to join the N school, and you made no mention of that. Also, you just joined because you heard stories? People join the N school because they're qualified leaders, and the best around.

Issue three: You breezed through N school with seemingly no issues, despite having very little mentioned skills that would allow you to do so.

Issue four: "Gaining a semi-depressive state every now and then due to the heavy stress caused. Upon the fall of the Reapers, it wasn't until then did she feel like herself, somewhat. Seeking advice from a psychologist however, she was deemed fit still to continue with the N-6 training, and hopefully the N-7 following this." You're depressed and bipolar? This goes into the liability thing. N7 soldiers need to be pretty much in perfect health. Suffering from depression makes you more of a liability, which is a no.

Issue five: Grammar. There is a plethora of grammatical errors throughout the app, even in your replies. I only can wonder how your grammar is on the server. Please fix your grammar issues in the app, and use spellchecks.

Overall, you need to fix a lot. Lastly, if I'm not supposed to comment here, I apologize.

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Re: Snowy's N7 Application

Post by Snowy on Thu May 05, 2016 4:32 pm

I thought I removed everything relating to the bipolar mishap because it was already pointed out. I sorted that.

The officer thing I did leave out, yeah. My apologies. When I get the time to sort that out, then I will.

Again, got rid of the whole bipolar idea. However, being depressed is a possibility regardless due to what was happening at the time - even as a N-Operative. If I'm wrong, then I will correct that too by all means.

Sure, look. Mistakes happen, I probably have plenty of mistakes in this reply but atleast its understandable. On the server, basically the same. Never ran into a issue of extremely bad grammar or spelling that wasn't misinterpreted or misunderstood. Again, however. I apologize for my oversight on this aswell. Half of my corrections were on my phone while I did the main application on the computer. But sure, look!
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Re: Snowy's N7 Application

Post by MasterMedicMan on Thu May 05, 2016 6:53 pm

icechuck11 wrote:I'm gonna cut in here.

Issue one: Bipolar ism. Despite signing a waiver, you're joining the most difficult to join special operations unit in the Alliance. Having a medical disorder like your character does makes them a liability, waiver or otherwise.

I can see what you're getting at in here. Bipolar disorder isn't usually welcome, depending on the case of BPD. Not all cases are 'pissy moodswings 24/7,' but I see what you're getting at.

Issue two: How you joined the N program. You need to be an officer to join the N school, and you made no mention of that. Also, you just joined because you heard stories? People join the N school because they're qualified leaders, and the best around.

People join Special Forces all the time because they hear stories, or pick up wind of it. That's what propaganda is, ontop of just news and pamphlets in the military. It should also be implied that the person went to OCS. Typically, in an application, we don't look for the things that were pulled straight from the wikipedia. We look for how the character actually acts.

Issue three: You breezed through N school with seemingly no issues, despite having very little mentioned skills that would allow you to do so.
Refer to the above point -- N7 are Jack-of-All-Trades soldiers. They can specialize, but either way, what's to say this person doesn't want to be a generic rifleman? Or a generic tech specialist?

Issue four: "Gaining a semi-depressive state every now and then due to the heavy stress caused. Upon the fall of the Reapers, it wasn't until then did she feel like herself, somewhat. Seeking advice from a psychologist however, she was deemed fit still to continue with the N-6 training, and hopefully the N-7 following this." You're depressed and bipolar? This goes into the liability thing. N7 soldiers need to be pretty much in perfect health. Suffering from depression makes you more of a liability, which is a no.

Depression is expected during a war like the Reaper War. Any war, or combat for that matter. It's expected. I don't know what you think depression is, but it's hardly disqualifying by any means unless you're suicidal. tl;dr: expect depression, minor or major.

I deleted the bit of the post that was unnecessary for what I'm about to explain here. I'll highlight each issue and explain the deal.
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